Sprakatakfrak

Freedom?

2012-02-13T20:50:00.000-08:00

I always thought that I am free.

Free to move...

Free to eat...

Free to talk...

Free to sleep...

Free to love...

And free to do whatever I want to do.

It took me some time to realize that those freedom that I mentioned were the limitations that I have. Limitation is like a prison that binds me to stay where I am.

Basically, humans have physiological limitations. Our body tells us what we have to do and we act according to our body's instinct. Such as we eat because we are hungry. We sleep because we are sleepy.

Humans are also Social Animals. We cannot live in this world alone. We always need someone to relate to and need someone to affirm us. And this need tells us that our freedom to love or make friends or look for relationships is caused by this psycho-social need.

So, are we really free? I don't know...

All I know is, as long as we know how to be detached with these needs then we are free...

Starting again

2011-07-20T20:42:00.000-07:00

Right after I graduated college I am one of the first few in our batch who got a job in the media industry. My classmates said that i was lucky and they also said that they want my job. I worked as scriptwriter for three shows in a local cable channel. I could really say that my job was great! Everyday is a day to look forward. I don't just write, I also travel a lot (I write for a travel show). I also do extreme sports. I remember one time they forced me to go sky diving for an episode. I really said no. Before sky diving we also went scuba diving and yes, the experience was great but I almost lost my breath underwater that's why my dive master abruptly took me to the surface. I also interviewed great people and rubbed elbows with them (hahaha). I can't do all those things if I didn't have that job.

After one month and one week, I was able to produce five commercials. Produced two episodes of one hour travel show, two episodes of one hour sports feature and three biographies. I was also able to close a million worth concept. I could say that in one month time, what I have done was too much. I don't have any sentiments regarding the pay because I did not mind it when I applied for that job.

When I was still in college, my only wish for that moment is to graduate right away. I got bored at school and wanted to work already. And now, I always go back to school and sometimes ask my previous teachers to let me sit in their classes. I think that's the reason why I quit my first job. I tried to look for another job and found one. But its the same job just that in a bigger and more established network.

Before I could in the other network, I decided to go out of town for a vacation. I though it was just a vacation. When I came back to Davao, I realized that something is missing in me. That is why before I could start in my new work, I decided not to continue. I will be back in that place where I hope I could start again. I don't expect a life changing experience but instead, I emptied my self so that I will be able to absorb every new experience that I will encounter in that new place.

Sulat para sa iyo na boboto

2010-05-08T23:25:00.000-07:00

Dear 2010 Presidential Elections' Voters,

Sana po ay pag-isipan nyong mabuti ang inyong ihahalal na presidente. ang ibig kong sabihin ay huwag niyong iboto si NOYNOY. Hindi lang sa rason na siya ay abnoy kundi dahil narin sa dahilang mawawalan ng saysay ang ilang taon nang ipinaglalaban ng mga magsasaka sa Hacienda Luisita. Alam kong hindi tayo mga magsasaka pero mapapatunay lang po ito na hindi niya kayang ayusin ang mga problemang sakop ng kanyang kapangyarihan bilang pamilya aquino, ano pa kaya kung buong Pilipinas na ang hahahawakan niya?

Opo, si noynoy po ay isang Abnoy. Sinong normal na tao ba ang hihingi ng basbas sa simbahan upang tumakbo eh siya din naman ang isa sa nag sulong sa Reproductive Health Bill? nasaan ang consistency mga kaibigan? Kung ibig nyo pong mamarapatin, nais ko po sanang mag bigay ng babala na hindi basta basta ang mga malalaking tae este tao na nakapaligid kay noynoy. Kung nanghihingi siya ng pondo sa mga malalaking negosyante para pondohan ang kanyang kampanya, dapat ho tayong matakot sa mga kapalit non kapag siya ay nanalo.

Sana'y huwag ho nating ihambing si noynoy kay obama dahil hindi ho galing sa marginalized group si noynoy. Isa po siyang elitista. kung ang makakapanalo lang pala sa kanya ang mga magulang niya, sana ay tumakbo naring presidente si KC Conception sa kadahilanang sikat din ang kanyang pamilya. Alam kong napaka babaw ng aking paghahambing subalit sa ganitong paraan po natin maiintindihan na wala pa siyang napatunayan sa kanyang sarili.

Sa pagboto nyo po ngayong darating na eleksyon, naway piliin po ninyo ang may angking kakayahan at pagmamahal sa karapatan ng bawat tao at pagmamahal sa kalikasan at sa bayan.

Sabi ho nila, "Ang hindi boboto ay walang karapatang mag reklamo". Higit ho akong naniniwala sa mga katagang iyon subalit wala ho akong magagawa kung tadhana na mismo ang nag utos na hindi ako makakaboto. Higit sampung libong kilometro po ang lau ko ngayon sa bayan kung saan ako narehistro, kaya hindi po ako makakaboto. Subalit huwag nyo lang po itong gawin para sa akin kundi para narin sa mga hindi makakaboto at hindi pa makakaboto.

maraming salamat po.

Umaasa,

Sprakatakfrak

Food and snot

2010-04-27T11:50:00.000-07:00

I love to eat street foods such as fishball, kwek kwek, and many more. Last weekend, my friends and I went to divisoria to stroll along the narrow streets of divisoria. People where flooding. i almost lost my breath when i battled just to pass the sea of people. I don't know if i am claustrophobic or what, but i almost lost my consciousness while walking along that alley. Stampede will more likely to happen in places like divisoria but the funny thing is, even if it happens everyday, there is no history of stampede at the streets of divisoria. The congestion of people along divisoria moves like a trapped snot in your nose. it needs a little sneeze to move forward or you could just let it flow and wipe it with a tissue.

For the name of street foods, i will cross the ocean, soar the sky and CHAR!

UPDATE

2009-12-01T23:34:00.000-08:00

I was away from my virtual world for about a month. Ewan ko lang kung bakit, di lang talaga siguro ako inspired. nag lag ang buhay for 1 fuck'n month. Now, I can say that I already have changes though konti lang. Buhok ko, gimik days koand even sleeping hours ko. One more, nabigo na ako sa inaakala kong pag ibig. Akala matitikman ko na ang pipniprito kong itlog, yun pala iba ang kumain. Well, buti narin siguro at nangyari yun, kasi, even if i failed, i regained our friendship naman eh. Katunayan, we went on picnic one evening night and talked a lot of things. Ayaw ko na sana siyang makita, kaso, how can i move on if di ko sasanayin ang sarili ko na makita siya every summer? Papalapit pa naman ang x'mas break.
Too much about it, well ahem ahem... mas napadali ang pag move on ko kasi meron akong nakilala. hahaha grabe... (kung alam mo, wag kanang maingay kung sino.) Well, di pa naman kami nag uusap nang harapan, di rin kami nag ttxt. Wala lang. hanggang sa mata ko lang siya. hahaha. well, if given a chance? WHY NOT!
Totoo nga talaga na walang perpektong tao sa mundo! everything has its butt este! but. hmm natatakot ako na baka hindi kami magka diniganpag mag uusap kami. pero ok lang cute parin xa!!! hahaha! mas naentice nga ako ng nalaman ko na may ganun pala xa. hahahay... kailan kaya??? kailan???

Pagbiya

2009-10-06T10:06:00.000-07:00

COMA 110 PROJECT A STORY BOARD ENTITLED...

I'm coming back

2009-10-06T06:13:00.000-07:00

Matagal ko nang kinalimutan ang hilig ko sa photography, hindi dahil wala akong camera kundi nawalan ako ng tiwala sa mga kuha ko. Now, I'm taking up meda 102 which discusses photography. Wala masyadong tao ang nag aapreciate ng pictures ko sa school ko ngayon, di tulad nung sa high school pa ako. Kaya naman parang nawalan ako ng hilig na ipursue ang dahilan ng pag kuha ko ng kursong communication arts. Nakaka miss din pala pag may nagpapaboost ng confidence mo. kahit simpleng "nice", "cute" lang, masarap paring pakinggan. Wala nang puwang ang mga papuri para sa akin ngaun dahil dito sa pamantasan ko, marami nang magagaling.

Kamakailan lang nagkaroon kami ng photo exhibit. Graded ito kaya obligatory mag submitt. Nakakatuwang isipin na naka place ang dalawa kong pictures.

3rd place ang picture na to entitled Hopia, Mani, Popcorn

"Shiplag" 6th place

Ang sarap isipin na napili ang dalawa out of one hundred twenty pictures na kasali sa exhibit. nakahilera ko pa ang kampyon sa katatapos lang na Petron Arts photography competition.

Insomnia

2009-08-25T19:41:00.000-07:00

Bago ako matulog, naka set na ang alarm ng cellphone ko sa 7:30 am. Ang sarap sanang matulog ng maaga sa kwartong malamig at madilim, ngunit di ko ito nagagawa. Alas dos y'medya na kung ako ay matulog dahil sa napakaraming bagay.

1. From school, natutulog ako (5:30-7:00 minsan 7:00-8:30) kaya nawawala ang pagod ko sa katawan nakakapag pahimbing sa aking tulog.

2. While watching TV or while smoking, umiinom ako ng kape at nakakaubos ako ng 2-3 cups every night.
(Ewan addict na siguro ako)

3. Ang liit ng electric fan sa kwarto namin. apat pa kami sa kwarto na naghahati sa kakarampot ng hanging binubuga ng electricfan.

4. Nangangati talaga ang paa ko kapag hindi nakakalabas pag gabi. minsan, narerealize ko na gusto kung lumabas kung patay na ang ilaw sa kwarto.

5. Tama ba namang nag fifilm viewing ang mga roommates ko with out using any headphones para di na sila makapang bulahaw sa mga kasama nila sa kwarto. Ayaw ko namang manuod kasi Naruto naman ang pinapanood nila, buti sana kung porn.

6. Most of the time, di ko nararamdaman na nasa loob ako ng kwarto ko sa bandang ala una ng madaling araw. Feeling ko, nasa durian bar ako kung saan sikat ang mga scream-O bands dito sa davao. Grabe ang hilik ng room mate ko na adjacent sa bed ko. Ang kabilang kwarto naman na plywood lang ang pagitan, tila nag kokonsert sa lakas drum rolls ng kanyang hilik.

7. Recently, umandar ang asthma ng isa kung roommate, meron kaming nebulizer sa loob ng kwarto. Naawa ako sa kanya ngunit later on, naconvert ang aking awa sa inis. Ang sama kasi pakinggan ng pag hinga niya. parang may laway na nakabara sa ilong at lalamunan. grrr..........

8. Kapag gusto ko nang matulog, lumalabas na ang mga crazy ideas ko. mga imaginations na dapit lumalabas pag nagboblog ako. grabeh ang pag function ng utak ko pag gusto nang magpahinga ng mata ko.

9. Minsan, sa tuwing nakapikit na ako, meron akong naririnig na ewan ko ba kong ano. pero alam ko tiyan ko yon. nagugutom ko pag gabi. lalabas nanaman ako para bumili ng pagkain.

10. Di ako makatulog sa kaiisip ng mga bagay na gusto kong mapanaghinipan, mga bagay na sa tingin ko ay sa panaghinip ko lang makakamtan. Frustrated ako na mapanag hinipan ang mga bagay na yun. Naisip ko tuloy na kaya siguro ako nahuhuli sa klase dahil ayaw ko nang gumising. Dahil tuwing umaga, pare-pareho lang naman ang nangyayari. ayaw ko na, aywa ko nang magising...

Number 2

2009-08-25T00:27:00.000-07:00

It took 4 months for me to recover after the relationship that I had. I was very young when I had my serious relationship which was my first and last as of this time.

I can see butterflies every time we're together. I loved that person fully but i later on realized that i wasn't giving my everything because I still have lies to protect my privacy.

From the beginning, I already new that it won't workout because someone came first before me.

I accepted that I can't compete with my loved one's spouse.

Yes, I used to be the "third party".

Despite the circumstances that we encountered, we stood still and acted as if superman against the villains.

There are no concrete villains, it was our personal issues that hinder us from living happily.

We were dating that time when my partner's phone rang and and hurriedly answered. The call was no big deal to me. I'm understanding when it come work and family.

"Got to go! my son, needs a parent in his school's PTCA meeting"

I was so down when i heard that, I was speechless for a moment until I uttered "Go, your son needs you"

After that incident, i realized that I can't stay as number 2 forever. I need to let go.

I don't want to give choices that will hurt me, instead, it will be better if I'm the one who will give the answer even if it hurts...

SAWALIHGIKAP

2009-08-23T06:03:00.000-07:00

Kung Budlay ang kinabuhi tungod sa gugma, dili gugma imong gikinahanglan.

Kung budlay ang barkadahay tungod sa kwarta, di kwarta ang kinahanglan.

Kung budlay ang mag inusara sa pag pamalandong, dili pamalandong ang kinahanglan.

PAKIGHILAWAS

Apan kung budlay ang pakig hilawas tungod sa gugma,

ayaw na huna-hunaa

Apan kung budlay ang pakighilawas tungod imo kining barkada,

ayaw huna hunaa

Apan kung budlay ang pakig hilawas sa imong kaugalingong kamot.

Pag hikog.

Marlboro Black

2009-08-12T20:02:00.000-07:00

Me: Bakit di na Marlboro Black ang yosi mo? Akala ko ba naadik ka na doon sa black?

Mandaya: Sumasakit kasi ang ulo ko doon sa black eh.

Me: (getting a pack of Marlboro black from my pocket)

Mandaya: Pahingi!!!

Me: Akala ko ba sumasakit ang ulo mo sa black?

Manadaya: (Puffing the cigarette)

Why Bengan Fans' club?

2009-08-11T01:00:00.000-07:00

I was in my 1st year college when my teacher in Humanities 2 asked us to make a blog so that he could check

if our writing skills is improving. Since I am a delinquent student (going to school late, not making

assignments etc.), i went inside the classroom not remembering that on that day is our deadline to submit our

URL. I sat on the extreme left at the back. He asked one by one for our URL. I can't give any. So I rush to

the computer room and crammed in registering for a blog. All URL that i can think has been used already,

so i thought of something stupid, something that could feed the ego of my teacher. I used his last name and

inserted a fans' club after it. and thats it!

Now, he is leaving our school... Bye Mr. Bengan

To Come out is to come in

2009-08-11T00:14:00.000-07:00

Weeks ago, I had an invitation to play badminton with friends whom i just met in a night out. They asked me

if i play badminton and i said "yes". Then, my escapades started. In my first night of playing with my

badminton buddies, its already as ecstatic as coming out. After playing, Fritz, the one who drove the car said

that we will passed by his friends eatery to have some beer and flirt with the locals. after 2 bottles,

someone donated another 2 bottles and after 2 bottles, I donated 2 bottles, and many more bottles followed.

We were not yet drunk when everyone started to dance the "budots-budots" dance (a dance distinct in

davao, mostly by the juveniles). after learning some steps, someone turned of the lights off, our only source

of light is the light from the lamp post outside. While its dark, the guy wearing a jacket and a short pants

stood up and danced while slowly stripping his clothes. i was in the midst of shock and excitement. I cant

help my self by cheer as well as the others. He stripped everything until the only covering he has is a

motorcycle helmet. I was so happy! hahaha, definitely happy.

I realized that the first step to come out is self acceptance...

Deja vu

2009-08-04T01:00:00.000-07:00

After many people risked their lives to destroy the dictatorship, here we are again. We are faced with another trials by which was static for 20 years. When Sen. Noynoy Aquino, the son of the late Pres. Corazon Aquino was was interviewed whether he will run as president for the 2010 elections. He said that he will not let another dictator rule. He added that the Aquino's are always the sweeper of dictators in the country and he won't let it happen again.
As our beloved late President Cory Aquino departed from heaven may the spirit of democracy remain in our country. We should not let another hunter to put put us in the cage while we are waiting to be eaten alive. As what President Cory said, LABAN!!!
May the death of President Cory be an Eye opener, a cold water or a slap after a long sleep.

can't leave sports

2009-03-22T07:11:00.000-07:00

I've been to a lot of sport already. tennis, badminton, basketball, well been there, done that. When my doctor asked me to quit playing those tiring sports, i felt so lifeless and weak. I started venturing to computer games and books, but seems like something is missing. When my uncle died due to snake bite, I stayed a week or more in his wake. people are playing majhong, card games, scrabble and etc, well i have no interest to those stuffs. when i glanced at the corner i saw flock of kids clapping and cheering vigorously. my curious mind draw me to that corner. There, I saw a table with rackets smaller than my lawn tennis racket. There, I met Pingpong.
After my uncles' wake, i asked my did if is it ok for me to play such sport. we consulted my cardiologist and she said that pingpong would be ok. I started playing pingpong so often. I studied every move and stroke. later on, i asked my dad to make me a table so that i can play at home. i was so happy when he granted my request. i competed lots of tourneaments and i can say that i excelled though not as good as the national players. Now that I'm in college, i still indulge my self in this sport. i realized that my previous sports need too much energy and strength. In table tennis, what i need are concentration and agility. I'm so proud to say that I'm playing the fastest game on Earth. Im leaving this saturday for a week long tournament in Manila... Wish me luck(:

will you believe it is for me?

2008-08-12T00:31:00.000-07:00

What
If the Lady Oracle were right,
her soothsayings about you,
dooms about me,
would I be surprised if I rekindle same mishaps- again,
for I quest for nothing but grimness.

If she were right,
then I'd rather spend with the moon
and long for its rippling reflection
on pure waters and taste the sweetest solitude

than be hopeless of you

like a child mooning for a
chocolate candy bar through a double-glazed
tagged box-

Because

YOU ARE

so inviting, yet so unwaiting

forever-

And

I AM

just but your two-day

B
E
A
U

forever

I hate march!!

2008-03-11T21:41:00.001-07:00

March, march, march....

god!!! the previous month, i can still sleep at 10 pm and wake up at 7:30.
Now, i sleep not less than 12 and to the maximum of no sleep at all.
I wake up at 5 to review my lessons and make my home work.
For those who will graduate, march is best month of the year.
Yes, I know!!! I'm bitter because i still need to soak my self in this institution.

March is the time for repentance for all the projects that you haven't done and lesson you have not studied.
Yes, I'm so fed up with loads of research papers and reports.
God, if only I can turn back time. I should have done this earlier.
I'm so used with doing last minute project and last minute reviews for the exam.
In short, I'm a crammer. I don't know!!!
I just love to cram. I think that my brain only function when it is under pressure.

I already tried to study ahead of time but it's just that I can't remember all that I have read when the moment of evaluation comes.

Wanted Filipino Translator for Miss World

2008-03-11T00:43:00.000-07:00

I cant really paint the picture if why Janina San Miguel of, a Bb. Pilipinas contestant passed the preliminary interviews done by the respectable jurors (respectable?). OMG! Since pre-school, we already have our English subject. Janina is a Mass communication student of UE, god!!!! MASS COMM!!!!
But it really doesn't matter if she speaks English as fluent as the past beauty queens. It's in the context of what she is saying. but i think, even her answer was out of context!!!
Venezuela got loads or crowns and awards though they bring translators, so what's the matter if she answers in Filipino and someone will translate it English? Well as of what I said, it's the context that matter and not the language.
Philippines really needs a very good translator in the coming pageant. As of what I observed, the Q&A for the international pageants is not a battle among the candidates but a battle among the translators. The translator can manipulate the answer to make it sound grammatically and pragmatically correct.
Congratulations to Janina!!!

BSN Passers!!! Retake!!!!

2008-03-05T19:10:00.000-08:00

what if the Phil. PRC will announce a retake for the nursing board exam? maybe because of another leakage or some technical error.
i remember my friends' faces when they browsed their name in the site where the result of the nursing board exam was posted. poor one, i can't imagine their big smiled face turning into frown.

Nowadays, foreign hospitals don't consider Phil. Nursing Board Exam as big edge to enter to in their hospital. Because of the scandal which happened a year ago, Nursing Board exam is not a reliable source to test the proficiency of the aspiring nurses.
after the exam, a friend told me that all question from a part of the exam (i don't remember if which part) was tackled during their review. i thought that reviews just practice and refresh you mind well i was wrong. there's something to be knew about review centers.
hmmm... by the way congratulations...
don't take it seriously

cutting classes

2008-03-02T19:50:00.000-08:00

Photo: Lee
Edited:Lyan

NBN (National Biased Network)

2008-02-29T01:12:00.000-08:00

Our teachers usual say that the media should be neutral in any issue.
It was 11:10 pm when i came home from a social gathering. when i came in passing through the back door, i noticed that someone is still watching the television. It's my land lady. I lay down in the sofa, made my self comfortable, i ask her if what is the news all about. She said that about the ZTE scandal. I asked her if what station and she said that it's NBN.
NBN sounded new in my ears. Since I am concern of what of our National crisis, I spent time to watch the news. It's not really a new because it's a live open forum entitled "Kapihan ng Bayan". Big time business men were asked about their said about the Zte scandal.
they sound so unaffected of what is happening. well, that was not what I'm blabbing for. i found the anchor men so bias. then i realized that NBN is a Government sponsored TV station. yes!!!

so dirty!!!!

preserved

2008-02-26T06:33:00.000-08:00

I have been one among other journalists who were chosen to go for a fact finding mission. at first, i thought it will be an easy job. I expected no pressure and a happy go lucky job. I and my co-journalists thought that the place where we will go is already slightly developed. we thought that we will be distributed to different home owners and will be given comfort in terms of sleep. I did not brought any beadings nor any toiletries because i planned to by my needs in the assigned place. When we took off at 4:00 am from my friend's apartment bound to the assemble area, i felt no worries. "this will be a trip where i can c no danger and problems".
we arrived in the city and i breathed so deep and thought that it would be the place where we are going to go. But our EIC said that we still haven't reached the halfway of our destination. yeah, she was true, we are still very far, so far away. we left the city for about 9 am. we reached a small town which will be our portal to ride motorcycle to reach our destination. we reached the motorcycle terminal at 1 pm and we ate our lunch. God, what a lunch... the viand and the rice were placed in a cellophane. I ate in a standing position and forced my self to be contented of what i have.
While we are on our way to our final destination, i was very very nervous in my motorcycle ride. I seated in a side wind position with my feet hanging. i can't fold my feet because there are loads at the side of the motorcycle that hinders my comfort and safety. The sun stroke directly to my face. i was lucky because me and my friend bought 2 shades for about 160 php.
we reached the place and i was really amazed of what i saw. tribal people who are still in costume. the place was isolated from the town. no electricity, 1 store with very few and limited stocks of cigar (oh no!), and a small school made of bamboo skin.

I was very happy to know that there are still people who preserves their culture.

valentine

2008-02-18T23:36:00.000-08:00

i was very happy during my valentine's day. for the first time, i received letters. I received one fraternal card from my room mates whom i treat as my older siblings. the other letter is a love note. It's a love poem made by someone who names itself as scar on the forehead. The poem is very nice which made me think and conduct further investigation about the mysterious sender of the said love poem. I hope i can post it here, but i can't because i misplaced it. I hope i can have it again or have another copy of it so that i can share it with you guys. The mysterious sender gave me another poem four days ago and i have just read it. it is also nice. i want to post it here but i want to post the first poem.

kuya wag po

2008-02-11T01:38:00.000-08:00

I can't look straight to my landlord's eyes after the incident last night. I realize we are so at home in his house. We forgot that we have visiting hours. some friends came to our boarding house last night. We talked a lot to the point that we ended drinking. we drank with music at the balcony of the house. we laughed and shouted so loud. suddenly, kuya came out and mocked us. huhuhu... i was very ashamed..

I don't want to forget about it. . .

2008-02-06T18:05:00.000-08:00

An experiment to give me excitement
clinched my bones and fed my fantasies
you are not the one who have fascinating looks
but your words deceived my poor mind

We brushed our lips all over our body
we didn't mind if we have tasted our own sweat
I thought it was just lust which pervades me
because i close my eyes during that time

I can't look straight to your eyes while touching your body
because maybe I'm ashamed of my self
You kept the conversation alive while doing our thing
but I just answered you a nod or a smile

When we both perspired our fantasies
We just acted like nothing happened
You said that you felt vandalized and so did I
But inside me said that It was heaven I found

We split up and tried to acted normally
I saw the guilt in your eyes and I tried to mimic it
but its just that I felt satisfied and happy
and hoped that this is not the last

-Lee

When lust turns to love

2008-02-05T19:54:00.001-08:00

when lust turns to love, it's difficult to handle. having an intercourse with someone you fantasize is a great deal. who ever will ask you as long as you fantasize her/him not only it's good looks but the way she/he plays with words, you will surely grab the opportunity of getting laid. while brushing your lips together, swiping your hands to each other's body you will sure ignite. a fire will slowly eat you up, so hot! the sensation caused by penetrating or being penetrated pervades your system. you must admit that you cannot look at your partner's eyes. because it was just lust and not love. your closing your eyes while doing your thing. after showing your orgasm and relief for what happened both of you will stand like nothing happened. your partner said that she/he felt vandalized every after intercourse. you said that even you feel same way too. now, you can dare to look to your partner's eyes. you can see the guilt in it's eyes. but you felt something unusual in your senses. you are starting to stare it's eyes without a wink. you felt ashame staring it's naked body. both of you decided to fix your selves and go home. as you rest after the exhausting intercourse you will feel that something is missing. the orgasms resound in your head. you can see the vivid image of your partner. you think, your in love but you know that it was just your partner's trip. you can't help but cry. you cant risk the love that you feel for another ecstatic experience.

walk out!

2008-02-03T18:52:00.000-08:00

I was sad when i saw that only few students marched to the streets to fight for their rights.
the USC have done their job in announcing the said protest walk out. But they did not give so much effort in explaining if why are we going to walk out from our designated classes. I, as a concern student, i really banned my class that afternoon. I marched in the streets at the same time, i took pictures for HIMATI. I heard that many have walked out from their classes but they just went to the campus tambayans and some went home. We may not care right now but let's not wait for the time that we will regret for not doing this and that.
Humans were made to be so demanding, we demand this and that but the fact is we can do or ask what we want before we needed it very much.

photo by: barry ohaylan

Heath broke

2008-01-28T01:34:00.000-08:00

I remembered, it was January 23, Ram ran towards with his sad face. I asked
asked him if what happened. "Heath Ledger is dead," Ram said while crying without tears. "As if he is your boyfriend or your relative," i reacted with sarcasm. "he is a big lost in the gay community, he is an icon," Ram said.

I remembered Heath Ledger in his movie Brokeback Mountain. He may not relevant for the decline in our economy but still many were sad in his death. I hardly can't react like how Ram reacted but i saw the sympathy in his eyes. I thought of reasons why Ram reacted that way. it's maybe because he is looking forward for another gay movie that can inspire many lives of gays who came out, will come out and gone loud.

condolence ram!!!
hahaha...............

hmmm

2008-01-17T19:03:00.000-08:00

valentines is approaching, i'm still alone. will sombody come and fill up my missed fantasies?
huhuhu....